Hoff Home

check it out!!

2009-11-01T11:04:00.000-08:00

I'm in the process of creating a new BLOG for our little fam. For the moment, you can find it at www.gigglebean.com/brotherhood. It's got bigger images and its a little more fun to play with. Wander over, check it out... and leave me a note so i know you stopped by! :)

the rocket and the bear

2009-10-31T20:39:00.000-07:00

We had an absolutely awesome day. The boys were so happy.... from the party in the morning to a fun night trick-or-treating. I have tons of pix to share - but for now... I present you with the rocket and the bear:

party hardy

2009-10-31T15:19:00.000-07:00

We held our annual kiddo halloween party this morning, but this year it was Jameson's first birthday, too! My friend Nini's water broke on my couch at this very party last year! ha! We had so much fun with all the little munchkies running around. Here's a shot with almost all of' them. Loo loo is running back into the photo and a couple just plain protested. And that's ok. I'll have pix of the boys in costume soon, too!

pumpking carving

2009-10-26T20:49:00.000-07:00

Oh my... carving pumpkins with 2 little helpers was BUSY! And then D and I were left with all the work. But the boys had a blast! S described the insides as 'seeds and hair'.

S liked his pumpkin 'cuz it was the color of flames!

Monkey see... (look at S in the back commenting 'eeeeewwwwwwwwwww')

Monkey DO! Here's jj lifting up a spoonful of pumpkin guts laughing and chanting 'nummy' after watching his daddy's joke...

S wanted one scary and one silly...

Our masterpieces:

And daddy and S used a template of an Eiffel Tower (which jj identified by name - wuh?) to model a rocket pumpkin... um, use your imagination. :)

big boy beds

2009-10-25T20:30:00.000-07:00

A little too worn out from the day for a picture post, but suffice it to say both boys are tucked snugly into their new big boy beds. S got a new twin bed (a 5hr construction project - thank you ikea) and J inherited S's toddler bed. All this to make room for the little man set to appear in about 2 months time.

Next challenge... same room! But one thing at a time here. Pix to come tomorrow...

october in preschool

2009-10-23T16:33:00.001-07:00

I know I've mentioned this before (and recently), but we LOVE S's school. They have done some really fun and creative Fall crafts lately. Obviously, lots of pumpkins... but also scarecrows, leaves and the Farm. Here's a few that have come home recently...

And the Bible story they are focusing on this month is Noah's Ark. All the kids got to build their own "Ark". Here's S's masterpiece:

he loves me...

2009-10-23T16:25:00.000-07:00

So I'm 30 weeks pregnant. And what does the man do? He comes home with cupcakes from one of my favorite bakeries in LG... just 'cuz.

...shoulda taken a pic of all 6 (yes, there *were* 6) but this was the only one left. :) And for the record, I did share (a little).

Hat #2

2009-10-20T16:33:00.000-07:00

Hat #1

2009-10-20T13:37:00.001-07:00

rainy day

2009-10-19T10:39:00.001-07:00

So it actually started coming down pretty hard by the time we got home from the market this morning... perfect for some puddle stomping but not so perfect for my camera. But I did manage to scoop a couple shots.

I fully intend to do a photo shoot with the boys in their new hats, but here's a preview of one of them:

PC

2009-10-17T19:21:00.001-07:00

So I'm now back on a PC. Did I mention my multi-talented husband *made* one for me... I mean, totally from scratch!! It's faster and has WAY more space (not to mention in-house support) than my albeit a bit glitzier MAC. But I'm so proud of him... and thankful. Now I just have to remember how to do everything the PC way. hmmm....

this morning

2009-10-17T16:18:00.000-07:00

I had a photoshoot this morning, and since my clients were running late, I had a few rare moments to just check out God's beautiful morning in silence... the dew drops (or doodledrops, as my 3-yr-old subject this morning called them) were like gems.

proud daughter moment

2009-10-15T13:49:00.001-07:00

About a month ago (ok, this post is overdue), was the Begonia Festival. My mom was the featured artist. Part of that honor includes an artist's reception and poster signing at a local gallery. Here are just a few of my talented mom in action...

Oh, and one of the new pix of JJ that debuted that weekend:

Our punkins at the patch

2009-10-11T09:37:00.001-07:00

A bit of a departure for us, we decided to stick closer to home this year and just headed a bit up the coast... And we enjoyed a cold, blustery afternoon. Perfect for pumpkin patching. :)

This is usually how we know jj is getting tired... and he's really tired is two hands go up!
And the big guy had a bit of a hard time when some dust his brother threw made its way to his eyes... but by the end of our excursion all was well with the promise of a chocolate covered marshmallow pumpkin - and a perfect photo op!

still my baby

2009-10-10T21:14:00.000-07:00

... for another couple months. He's just cut his bottom eye teeth - brutal! In fact, they just broke the surface in the last couple days so we're hoping that we get some relief in the whiny/nap department soon. But my goodness, he is beautiful!

this guy

2009-10-05T15:12:00.001-07:00

I like him... a lot.

He made me a new computer last night... fyi. Brilliant man.

fun... squared

2009-10-05T15:05:00.000-07:00

My friend Ashley just turned 30 and her hubby decided to throw her a square dancing party at 'The Farm'... the new property they just bought. It was sooooooo fun to celebrate her with lots of friends and laughing so hard our stomachs hurt. Everyone dressed up and got into the spirit of it all. And we danced for hours with this crazy 'caller' they hired. Awesome fun! D even got to borrow some legit cowboy boots/belt/hat from friends of our parents. The yellow ostrich(?) boots had scorpions on the sides with a matching belt. And the stetson was so big, I couldn't even get in close for a photo. Hilarious!

genius

2009-10-05T14:02:00.001-07:00

Just talked to S's teacher... she thinks he's a genius (her words). Nothing like that to bring tears to a momma and puff up a daddy's chest with pride. :)

a variation...

2009-10-03T08:15:00.001-07:00

Last night I asked J to sing Jesus loves me. I heard this (in perfect tune):

"Jesus and me... din-o-saur..."

best buddies

2009-10-02T13:37:00.000-07:00

Miss A and baby J came over to play today. It gave me so much joy to watch them playing and loving each other. And I think I harbor a secret hope that maybe they'll just be friends forever.

now there's a compliment

2009-10-02T13:24:00.000-07:00

On Tuesdays, we dogsit my parent's golden doodle, Cooper. The boys love it. Cooper loves it... or at least the veritable dog buffet that is my floor. I think it works out well for everyone. This week, S was having his own conversation with Cooper off in a corner and checking out his fancy new collar. Then I hear:

"Cooper, that belt looks really great on you!"

important question

2009-09-26T20:01:00.000-07:00

tonight...

in bed...

after prayers...

and a conversation about God being with us wherever we go...

"Uh, momma... does God look like a rock?"

nothing like it...

2009-09-25T15:48:00.001-07:00

So I just have to say that there is nothing... truly nothing... on this planet like the whining of your own child(ren) to make you feel exhausted. I mean totally SPENT. It takes a ridiculous amount of energy (physical, emotional and otherwise) to divert it, avoid it, distract it, correct it, discipline it, channel it, ignore it.

On an entirely unrelated note, JJ picked up his Bible yesterday and started singing 'Jesus loves me'. It actually came out sounding more like 'Jesus and me'... so cute! He kept pointing to the little cartoony illustrations of Jesus excitedly shouting 'Jesus!' then he would clap his hands and say "YAY!!!"

a few more from the orchard

2009-09-22T13:25:00.000-07:00

And I just have to pause here to mention how much I am totally in love with my new 'dirty action set' for PS. Perfect for the dirt-loving fellas around here. I used them above and on a few more below. I can't wait to play with them so more!!

in celebration...

2009-09-22T13:05:00.000-07:00

OK, so today is officially the first day of Fall and I must thank God for not giving us the 101 degree day the weather reports were promising. Nevertheless, it is warm... dare I say - HOT? Anyhow, last weekend, I hosted an autumnal dinner party for my girls. Here are a few pix (clearly, I didn't have *any* fun decorating...) :)

a few apple picks... more coming soon!

2009-09-22T08:47:00.001-07:00

apple picking

2009-09-16T21:21:00.000-07:00

It was about 2 years ago when I started this blog. One of my first posts was a trip S and I took to pick apples. It's become a bit of a September tradition for us. I'm making my way through tons of photos - it was so inspiring! So they're coming... But here's a sneak peek. Tomorrow promises a delicious apple pie, homemade applesauce and fun baking with my boys...

whole sentences

2009-09-14T10:58:00.000-07:00

And Mr jj has taken a gigantic step this past month - articulating his thoughts in complete sentences. What started on our vacation as 'close the door' has evolved rapidly to 'where's the ball? oh, there it is. i got it.' It makes him seem so much bigger....

homey can read!

2009-09-14T10:55:00.001-07:00

We've been working on this a lot lately. But S can now read - officially. He has an easier time with all caps, but he can read almost any 3-letter word and even some with as many as 6 (as in 'rocket' - of course). He wants to practice all the time. So we're now on the hunt for some great first readers!

3... 2... 1...

2009-09-08T12:58:00.000-07:00

So we had just arrived in Portland, post-nap and the kiddos are all nestled on the couch in their skivies. It's too cute not to take a picture. But what happens when you take 3 still tired kids (aged 3, 2 and 1) and try to get them to 'pose'? This:

A few more of S on the beach....

2009-09-07T09:21:00.001-07:00

my little J on vacation...

2009-09-07T09:19:00.000-07:00

me and my rocket

2009-09-06T08:37:00.000-07:00

3.5

2009-09-03T12:49:00.000-07:00

Three and a half is such a fun age. Amid a sea of endless 'why's?' we have so much enjoyed S's insatiable curiosity about the way things work, space and the big things in life.

While in Oregon, we visited OMSI (Oregon Museum of Science & Industry). I remember going there on school field trips in elementary school! Anyhow, it was absolutely S's type of place. They had space capsules, rockets, robots, etc... But they also had a planetarium, which S called 'the rocket ride'. It was a show about the birth of a star, narrated by some guy from Star Wars... don't know who. The experience elicited several awe-struck "wow's" and he has continued to want to discuss it. On one such occasion, he asked his daddy "who was that talking... was that God?"

relief

2009-09-02T18:20:00.000-07:00

Thank you, Mr. Hose. You did right by us today. When it spiked to 100 and the kids were miserable, we headed for a little outside shower time. Ahhhhhhh... perfect!

really... it's the simple things

2009-09-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

Of all the toys we brought to the beach, it was a simple wand and a light breeze that tickled him most. Oh, the joy.

Then big bro gave it a whirl...

And in the end, even Grandma gave it a go!

brotherhood

2009-09-01T14:05:00.000-07:00

So we are home from our 'vacation'. School has started. It's September 1. I always celebrate the arrival of Fall on this day in full protest to the official solstice which (in my opinion) comes weirdly late. I'm baking pumpkin cookies. I'm pulling out the pinecones, pumpkin and pear decorations. Never mind that Sept/Oct are more 'summer-like' in our little corner of Earth any other months. To me - it is Fall. Time to settle in.

And on that note, the notion of raising a brotherhood is starting to sink in as well. I have to admit a bit of shock at the notion of all boys - no girls. And really had to take some time to let some 'girly' dreams go... and allow God to replant and begin to grow new ones. And Fall seems like the perfect time for that. I'm imagining what my life will be like with 3 boys running around and what that means for me as a mom, a wife, a woman...

And I'm starting in on some projects to get ready. Not that I need to - we could have another baby boy tomorrow and have everything that we need. But I need to. I have pix of the little guy to scan - but the scanner is in the garage so it's just sitting on my list of projects. Hopefully soon.

So Happy Autumn, everyone. And if you can't join me in my premature welcome of Fall, then Happy September at least. :)

This is the cool pear vase my sis gave me last week. Isn't it the neatest thing EVER!?

sand + water + little boy = happy

2009-09-01T13:46:00.000-07:00

jj takes it all in...

2009-09-01T13:44:00.001-07:00

Cannon Beach

2009-08-31T21:04:00.001-07:00

The first part of our vacation was in Cannon Beach, OR. David's parents treated us to several nights at an awesome place right on the sand. This is the sunset from our room that first night. I'm still working through my photos and tired enough from our trip that I'm plodding through rather slowly... but stay tuned for some very sandy mugs. :)

cousin 4... meet cousin 5

2009-08-30T13:07:00.000-07:00

I love my sister. Hangin' with her was one of the major highlights of this vacation for me. But what made it even extra fun was that we're both prego (with boys!). She gave me these awesome belly tattoos so we goofed around and handed David the camera (what a good sport, right?) - anyhow... this is Holly at 7 and me at 5 (months):

mine's a bit harder to read from far away...

Note: I paused here... wondering 'should I be mortified at posting pictures of my belly on the blog' but then decided that I had a sufficient level of courage - or more accurately, apathy. ;)

home

2009-08-30T08:38:00.000-07:00

... has never felt so good. We made it home from an awesome time in Portland yesterday. The boys champed it and we drove home in one day. So many memories and pictures. Can't wait to share...

things get silly late in the evening...

2009-08-15T20:20:00.001-07:00

... and can we just give it up for pre-season football? THAT is making me happy!

brotherness

2009-08-15T20:12:00.001-07:00

Being brothers is an interesting thing. Neither D nor I had more than one boy in our families so we both watch in wonder. It seems that the majority of time is suspended between delirious laughter and tears. You never know which direction it'll head and it often turns in a moment.

shooting stars

2009-08-13T16:18:00.001-07:00

Last night we finally had the clear night we've been waiting for. It is the annual perseid meteor shower. D and I woke up S pretty late at night and we all laid on the trampoline in our back yard, watching the stars. We saw several really huge ones - that blazed across the sky and left a fading trail behind them. It really was remarkable. And I think S loved seeing a real 'shooting star'.

the view from half-way there

2009-08-11T17:30:00.001-07:00

20 weeks today! That means we are officially half-way there bay-bee!

the air show ROCKS!!

2009-08-10T13:42:00.000-07:00

Honestly, I'm not sure there's a better place for 2 little boys than the annual air show. My fellas were in heaven. On Sat, D took S to see the blue angels. Then we all headed back to take it all in the following day - including meeting up with Uh-T and Jeannie.

Here, a warthog either dropped some sort of ordinance or was coordinated with some sort of canon on the ground. It was rather... um... dramatic. :)

Both boys got new planes to take home that made cool noises. But the hightlight for JJ was a blow-up dolphin toy with a little bell and squeaker inside. It just tickled his funny bone.

Then we found the NASA booth where S got to meet a real astronaut that had been on 4 missions. S taught the astronaut how to do explodo-nuks. He thought that was pretty cool. And he came home with NASA stickers and a signed poster.

Then, when we got home, we celebrated Uh-T's birthday with the yummiest peach devonshire pie. Happy birthday, little bro. Thanks to you both for loving our kids so much. You are seriously an AWESOME uncle. :)

sneak peek

2009-08-05T18:27:00.000-07:00

Too much cuteness, no? This morning, I got to break in my new camera (aka 'gorgeous') at the hospital taking photos of my new little nephew. OK, so he's not technically my nephew, but a cousin's kid feels like it. :) I have lots more. But this one was so darling I couldn't wait! :) Here's the newly minted 'big sis' holding her new brother. And Gorgeous preformed like a champ. I officially IN LOVE! And I just posted more pix of delicious little e. here.

hello gorgeous!!

2009-08-04T16:05:00.000-07:00

My new camera came today... charging now. GIDDY AS A SCHOOL GIRL!!!

jut a little tired

2009-08-01T15:16:00.001-07:00

and lest we forget...

2009-07-29T17:28:00.000-07:00

...this little one is 18 wks and counting!

I'm totally feeling him (or her) move all the time now. So cool. The munchie's 7 oz and measures roughly 5 1/2" from head to rump. That's about the size of a bell pepper! Finally, I've reached the part of pregnancy that's really fun for me. And strangers now know that I've got a baby in there... not just plowing through the ice cream! :) (though that does sound good!)

little fish!

2009-07-29T17:16:00.000-07:00

And this guy is like a totally different kid in the water this week. He suddenly decided it was ok to put his whole head in the water and has been a superstar in swim lessons. Today, the teacher even said he was almost floating on his own! We're very proud of our brave guy!

19... months, that is

2009-07-29T17:08:00.000-07:00

And still melting hearts!

his whole head!

2009-07-27T14:21:00.001-07:00

S put his WHOLE HEAD in the water. First, with help, on Friday. For that he earned a much-anticipated lunar module. Then again, today at swim lessons, on his own. What a big boy! :)

swim lessons

2009-07-23T13:10:00.000-07:00

We've so enjoyed our lessons this year. S just decided to be brave enough to put his face (not head... yet) in the water. Here are a few of him learning to float, glide, frog hop, and do torpedo kickers!

busy...

2009-07-19T07:44:00.000-07:00

I've got some new photos to add soon. Sorry it's been a boring week on the blog. You can check out my gigglebean blog to see what I've been up to all week! Here's a peek:

gigglebean blog

"fans"

2009-07-13T17:44:00.001-07:00

OK... so I started a gigglebean page on FB about a month ago. And I'm both amazed and embarrassed that I have 109 fans! How crazy is that!?!

(Well, to be honest, D would make me be clear that I actually have 110 -- he's just not on FB!)

at swim lessons today...

2009-07-13T14:45:00.000-07:00

My very cautious 3-yr old isn't too sure about parts of his swim lessons. Listening to fishies... OK. Looking for fishies... not OK. So as he approached the pool today his teacher lined up all 3 kids and had them (one by one) jump into the water. When it was his turn, he just looked at his teacher and said... "uh... can you teach me a *safe* way to get in the pool?"

Swimming pictures soon, I promise.

defeat.

2009-07-13T12:59:00.000-07:00

So, most days I like to tidy the living room at nap time... at the very least pushing things to the edges of the room to restore a moment (albeit fleeting) of sanity. But to be honest, there are days when the pointlessness of it seems to real. Today, I admit defeat.

hard times at the hofbrau

2009-07-10T18:12:00.000-07:00

It hasn't been easy lately. 3 1/2 and 1 1/2 each present some particular challenges here. J has been king of the tantrums... clearly trying to navigate his way through what is and isn't under his control. Ignoring them... managing them... isn't been exhausting. S is going through a 'not listening' phase. The amount of time I spend in a day correcting or mitigating mis-behaviors is uncanny. And the tricky thing here is that no particular instance of 'not listening' is, in and of itself, worthy of a major correction. But cumulatively, they are. Challenging times. I'm feeling the need to refocus. Be consistent. Be in prayer.

I'm able to laugh at the things that so mundanely come out of my mouth now. "Don't drive the train on your brother's face." "Please keep your pants on." "No, blueberries don't go in noses." (You get the idea...) But after a full day of referee duty I want to collapse.

Anyhow, my mom has been going through granny's journal and shared with me a quote granny had found and notated. It was particularly poignant to me as "CHAOS" is a word that has described my week well.

"There is no situation so chaotic that God cannot make great. He did it at Creation. He did it at the Cross. And he is doing it today." (I don't remember who said it... sorry)

this is summer...

2009-07-08T20:21:00.001-07:00

"ball"

2009-07-07T18:20:00.000-07:00

This week, J started pointing to my belly and proclaiming "ball". Thanks, j.

the size of an...

2009-07-07T11:33:00.000-07:00

our little #3

15 weeks

4 inches (head to tooshie)

2.5 ounces

[roughly.]

sleeping habits

2009-07-06T15:02:00.000-07:00

So this is a bit of a random post, but worth a chuckle anyhow. The last couple nights we have been finding our son in the *weirdest* sleeping positions. Last night he was sitting on the floor leaning his head back against his bed... sound asleep. But our favorite has to be 2 nights ago when we found him CROUCHING (imagine a deep squat) with just his head bent down on his bed. Fast asleep. How is that even possible!?

more from our FOURTH...

2009-07-06T13:27:00.001-07:00

We had a busy day planned for our little fellas... starting with breakfast at Grammy and Poppa's annual cinnamon roll breakfast. YUMMY!! Then we barely made it home in time to head to our neighbor's for their pre-parade BBQ. (We have the coolest neighbors!) S got to try hand-cranked ice cream with chocolate chips, which he thought was the best thing ever. Then we headed down for our local parade...

S made his own hat at school that he was so proud to wear.
And my folks joined us for the fun...
This is my fave...

JJ (after being awoken from a too-short nap) ate crackers pretty much the entire time.

And the "neigh-neigh's" were the highlight for him:
Then we did some late-afternoon sparklers.

Then daddy brought out 'the volcano'...

D and S headed down for the big firework show, too. But I was here. So no pix of that. Happy 4th everyone!

Happy Birthday, America!

2009-07-05T19:02:00.000-07:00

and then there's that...

2009-07-01T15:17:00.000-07:00

I found my 3-yr-old waking up from his nap with socks on his hands. He was a little confused... so was I.

"Hey buddy. Why are there socks on your hands?"

"I was pretending they were gloves."

"Did you sleep with them there?"

"Yah... they were my gloves."

[oh.]

randoms from the mind of 3

2009-07-01T13:14:00.000-07:00

In the fabric store... he noticed a fuzzy piece of fabric in a display bag:

"Why did God put it there?"

After an incredibly long walk full of "why's?" I suggested S provide some of the "becauses" himself.

"But I don't know all of the becauses. Maybe God can teach them all to me."

On a walk today...

"Everything is so beautiful!!! Everything God made is just sooooooo beautiful. I can't hardly believe it!!"

I love that.

one and a half

2009-06-30T13:58:00.000-07:00

So our little man reached a milestone last week! Oh, how the time flew. And we are enjoying him more than ever. He is fiery, spunky, social, joyous and darn cute! He loves, loves to dance and sing. He even danced to a diesel motor in a parking lot this weekend. His laugh is infectious and almost always in his belly. He loves to wrestle and rarely meets a challenge he doesn't think he can overcome. He'll say 'hi' and wave vigorously to anyone, unless he thinks playing shy will win more or better attention. And he wants to be just like his brother. In every way. All the time. It's almost as though he looks at the world with a little smirk, a head of curls to make any girl swoon and his massive brown eyes and says "I dare you not to smile back..."

sunshine on my feet

2009-06-30T13:46:00.001-07:00

bday party

2009-06-28T14:09:00.001-07:00

Yesterday we attended a first bday party for little miss e. e is S-bo's favorite reference when referring to a small baby ("oh, like e."). Anyhow, so fun to share some fun memories with dear friends.

My boys devoured the cupcakes... well, the frosting anyhow.

Here is little e. with her daddy. Isn't she precious?!

first popsicle

2009-06-22T14:25:00.001-07:00

Serious props to "Uh-T" (Uncle Trav) for treating jj to his first popsicle. Poor kid, working on cutting all 4 eye teeth, just wanted to keep it in his mouth. :)

One of granny's favorite prayers

2009-06-22T14:03:00.001-07:00

"Grant unto us, O God, the royalty of inward happiness and the serenity which comes from living close to Thee. Daily renew in us the sense of joy, and let Thy eternal Spirit dwell in our souls and bodies, filling every corner of our hearts with light and Grace, so that, bearing about with us the infection of good courage, we may be diffusers of life, and may meet all ills and cross-accidents, even death itself, with gallant and high-hearted happiness, giving Thee thanks always for all things; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen." (Robert M. Moynan)

my latest shoot

2009-06-16T19:32:00.000-07:00

Finally getting back to photo shoots after a personal month of May. Check out the link to my gigglebean blog on the right if you want to see more... they are some of my new favorites!

NEWS!!!

2009-06-14T13:17:00.000-07:00

And the beauty of our Father is that he is also the giver of life. And we will have the immense JOY of welcoming that life at the very end of the year. We are sooo excited!

her house

2009-06-13T11:51:00.000-07:00

Another late night of thinking... processing. You know, I really am so grateful for getting to be a part of re-telling this final chapter of Granny's story. It's been humbling for me. And as I was thinking about being a small part of her ministry, it struck me that she was just a part of something bigger, too. Her life, her choices, her words were all just re-telling how Jesus lived.

I did a photo shoot at granny's house a year ago. I'm revisiting those photos now - so grateful to have had the chance to do it. I'm better now and wish I could re-take these. But when I went back down to her house, it wasn't the same. It was empty and not full of all the life that made it hers before. Here are a few of the older series...

Granny spent much, if not most of her time here. Reading the Bible, writing notes, balancing her checkbook...
I've always been captivated by her hands. I remember being really little and just playing with them and trying to make the veins pop around. :) The middle photo here is what she did with her hands when she was saying something important.

I have lots of shots of granny's penmanship... and lots of saved letters.
And most of those letters and cards came with a clipping... a comic strip, a worthy column - just something extra.

from my heart... thanks

2009-06-11T16:14:00.001-07:00

Just a quick post today to thank all of you for your prayers and thoughts for our family. All of you have had such a ministry to my soul with your loving words.

I have some special pics of granny's place I've wanted to revisit. Maybe tomorrow?

"Heaven"

2009-06-08T17:54:00.000-07:00

By S. Age 3.

He wanted to draw great-granny in Heaven with Jesus. And decided there should be water since Jesus can walk on it. Gold streets and grass were a must... with a beautiful sun and blue sky.

"I think GG likes Heaven. I bet when I get to Heaven she will probably say that to me."

PS: This is a big deal... the first people he has ever drawn. Usually, it is only rockets (and prior to that... cars). Subsequently, he has decided that there are rockets in Heaven and would like to re-do this picture to include them. :)

from S.

2009-06-07T20:23:00.001-07:00

You know, last night he woke up at the exact time that granny died. Wide awake - crying that he didn't want to go back to sleep. Wow. So we were all up. I think S and granny had a special bond... he was born on her 89th birthday.

Here is S's prayer tonight:

"God, Thanks. Amen... for making great-granny's hurts all better in Heaven. Amen."

just like that

2009-06-07T15:19:00.001-07:00

Heaven is more real to me today than it was yesterday. And to be honest, as we've gone through these last days, it's been more real than the day before for quite a while now. I've thought of her all day, reunited with her Roy, her son, her grandkids and really, most of her friends. How special to go from an earnest (but rather lacking) choir to one so familiar and infinitely more beautiful.

And Jesus. Can you imagine seeing Jesus after a life-long apprenticeship? Wow. The presence of Jesus certainly feels more real today, too. Granny's always had a way of making him more real for me. And her death is no exception.

It is a glorious day here today. And I like to think its in her honor. My mom was remembering one of granny's more recent stories that I hadn't yet heard. She lived on a hilltop overlooking the bay. And she would walk outside daily. One morning, she was talking with God "It just smells so incredible today... like men's cologne." And she said she swore she heard in her heart, clear as day, "It is. It's mine."

And finally, the quote that she had taped everywhere and shared often...

So we will ride at ease over the breakers of this mortal life and not care too much what befalls us. Not from carelessness, but from soaring gladness of heavenly love.

Home with Jesus

2009-06-07T07:36:00.000-07:00

"Those who kiss the joy as it flies live forever in eternity's sunrise."

more from my day with granny

2009-06-06T17:16:00.000-07:00

It's so hard to know what to capture, you know. It really is such a beautiful experience. But it is death. And emotional. Here are a few shots from the day...

My mom painting granny in her bed:
Laurel blowing kisses...

Reading to her from her own Bible...
Trav and Jean came down...
And Julie came and played her flute for granny. It was so neat to see. Her brow was starting to furrow and she didn't look as peaceful as she had. Then, Julie started to play and her brow relaxed and she started tapping her toes. You could tell she just loved it. Really, what a beautiful gift and ministry, Jules.

keeping vigil

2009-06-06T07:18:00.001-07:00

Yesterday evening was one of those times I know for sure I will always remember and always cherish. For several hours, we sat with granny. My aunt and uncle, my mom, my cousin Todd and I... we held her hand, stroked her hair and kissed her cheeks. And then we sand hymns - old hymns. And while she couldn't sing along, she tapped her toes and even seemed to mouth a few of the words to 'It is Well'. This picture doesn't do her justice, but I know a lot of you wanted to see her. So this is for you:

My mom quoted lots of Scripture and we laughed, knowing she knew far beyond what we were able to remember. But she loved hearing Ps. 23.
And here we are just watching her breath. She would literally take 15 second breaks between 3 or 4 breaths. All we could do was watch. When every breath seems like it could be someone's last - you don't look away. But her breathing got steady again and the peace in her face returned. I don't yet know if she made it through the night...

You know, it's not sad... sitting there with her. I mean, I know sadness is something I will feel once she is gone and I miss her. But for now, waiting with her has a sense of anticipation and impending joy. I've never experienced anything like that.

visiting today...

2009-06-05T11:56:00.000-07:00

Today we went up and visited granny... as a family. She still knew who we all were. But when David walked into the room, she exclaimed "David!" and smiled. Loved that. S sang a special version of 'Jesus loves me'. She looked really beautiful.

I love this picture. Granny told my mom earlier that she's been dreaming about Roy... my Grandfather. Here, my mom is remembering with Granny how much my Grandpa loved being early. (And really, he did slip up to Heaven early... in his sleep. 10 years ago now??) Anyhow, he would tell her to be ready to leave at 6 and by 5:45 he would be tapping his toes in the driveway. :) So we were all joking that Grandpa was in Heaven, tapping his toes and pulling any strings he could to get her there sooner.

Right before they would leave anywhere, we would all hear Grandpa say this:

"Jeanette, get your purse." :)

my granny

2009-06-03T23:19:00.000-07:00

I can't sleep tonight. My heart is full of thoughts and tears and a little joy mixed in. My grandmother is slipping away. At 92, she is tired and we don't know for sure how much longer we'll have her here. And my grandmother is an incredible woman. She is the matriarch of our family... a family who, even in its extended expanse of 4 generations, loves and enjoys each other. She and my grandfather were passionate followers of Jesus who raised men and women (who then married exceptional men and women) who are passionate about following Jesus. They are generous, sacrificial and tender with their love for others... and their mom. Because of my grandparents' great faith and simple love, they have not only touched, but changed the lives of thousands. Me included.

And in the past month, I have watched her slip from relative self-sufficiency to utter dependence on others. No one wants to live like that. But she bore it with grace. I have often heard or seen in her the sentiment of Paul as he wrote to the church in Phillipi (my rough paraphrase) 'Oh, how I wish I could just go be with Jesus... which would be better by far. But instead God has chosen to let me remain... not as much for my sake, but for yours.' My dad and I were talking today and what really got me was when he shared with me that she is really teaching us all how to die; how to end life with grace, humility and peace. Eyes upward. And the amazing thing is that her character has remained constant, even when her mind isn't here. I've thought about that a lot today. Our choices in every day affect the actual texture of our hearts. And, really, that spills out whether we choose it or not - maybe most obviously at the end. While many face the end of life with anger, bitterness, fear... is that really just the spewing out of how we've lived our lives 'til then? I feel overwhelmingly inspired by that.

So my grandmother is in bed, yearning to be home with Jesus. More confident than ever that she is just a couple steps shy of Heaven itself. I remember when my grandfather passed away. It was like Heaven - the actual presence and joy of Jesus - took on a new shade of reality. And I sense that growing in my soul again. So I'm thankful for that... for her confidence in things unseen, which is faith. But I will miss her when she goes.

conversations with S...

2009-06-03T12:15:00.000-07:00

S: Is Kazillions a big number?

Me: Totally.

S: Can you count that high?

Me: Actually, I don't think I can. It's a really big number.

[pause... pondering]

S: Do you think God knows how much I love him?

grandma & grandpa visit

2009-06-02T17:17:00.000-07:00

So these pix are from about 2 weeks ago when D's folks were down for a little visit. The kids had a blast! Grandpa showed the kids how to clap the bubbles:

It was crazy-hot weather that weekend so we mostly hung out in the shade of our yard...

And of course did some jumping. Grandma even got in on the action:

more from d's bday dinner

2009-06-01T20:31:00.000-07:00

Poppa and Daddy helped transform a random costco box into a spaceship 'module' with dials and knobs... serious hit. Did you know the cardboard box was recently inducted in the the toy hall of fame?

JJ loves an audience. And both boys had fun wrestling with poppa and uncle T.
JJ saw this pic on my computer and about jumped out of his skin shouting "uh-T"!!
Uncle T and S made quite a masterpiece:

And S got to put the candles into the cake all by himself...

my birthday boy

2009-06-01T17:58:00.001-07:00

Had a little birthday dinner for D last night... more pix of that to come. But here's is the birthday boy in all his handsome glory! :) Yowza!!

little prayer

2009-06-01T12:10:00.001-07:00

Last night, tucking the little muchkin in after a fun day with the fam, celebrating D's bday...

"God, Thanks. Amen... for Daddy's birthday. God, thanks. Amen... for chocolate cake. And God, thanks. Amen.... for please making great granny feel better. Amen."

Completely unprompted. No doubt heard by our great God. I left his room with tears. Completely touched. My grandmother (who shares his birthday) is 92 and has had a rough month after a fall. It took her from relatively self-sufficient to requiring constant care.

peonies!!

2009-05-31T14:28:00.001-07:00

I honest to goodness squealed out loud as we walked past the flower stand at Costco this week. They had peonies! They have been making me smile every time I see them. My favorite flower... my favorite vase my parents bought me in Sweden:

I mean, come on... these are some of God's finest...

the daddy factor

2009-05-30T13:10:00.000-07:00

S is eating his lunch today and informs me:

"Today must be a really special day, huh. Because I got to go places and play outside."

Now, mind you, he didn't go anywhere special. His outing included the dry cleaners, the breakfast burrito joint and the car wash. And to my knowledge he didn't play anything different outside: bikes, trampoline, bubbles (the uzh. around here). So what made this day more special than any other day that we do exactly that (go places & play outside)? DADDY. We love daddy. And while I'm tempted to feel a little unsung, seeing his joy today was awesome.

Relatedly, a phrase I hear at least 20 times PER DAY is "Can you make it special today?" (infer whining tone) Usually uttered as we are finishing a fun activity, and actually not when he is just sitting there bored. So we are working on learning the following:

This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it! Psalm 118:24

"take a picture of me, mama!"

2009-05-29T13:59:00.000-07:00

... are words that are almost never uttered in this house. Usually, I hear the opposite. But last night that's exactly what he said. And he wanted his masterpiece documented as well.

happy birthday daddy!!!

2009-05-29T08:59:00.001-07:00

Happy Birthday to the hero in this house! When I asked S what he wanted to give his daddy, he thought about it and decided he wanted to give him something with butterflies on it. So we found these hanging monarchs. S was sooooo excited to give them to his daddy!

And he also gave him some really beautiful drawings, including one where he wrote his daddy's name!! (all on his own)

And the boys made brownies for their daddy to bring to work today. They both loved getting in on the stirring action...

Happy birthday, my love!

morning snuggles

2009-05-26T08:18:00.000-07:00

last day of school... the show

2009-05-24T16:47:00.001-07:00

Oh, how we have loved S's playschool. The teachers were so kind and invested. And it has been probably the single biggest learning experience for him these past months. On the last day of school, there was a little show. Forgive the quality of the images... and the sideways videos that I simply didn't care to straighten. :) He's looking more grown-up to me.

dancin' partners

2009-05-24T16:25:00.000-07:00

These are my other favorite photos from mother's day. S and I danced while jj had a great time dancin' with daddy. [sigh] I love these little men! You can click on these to see them bigger, btw.

the airshow

2009-05-24T16:19:00.001-07:00

OK, so I know this blog has been horrifically neglected the past weeks. We've all been sick for what feels like an eternity and are just now (finally) on the mend... hopefully. I'll try to atone for a general lack of posting in the upcoming days.

The big boys went to the airshow yesterday. Since S's current fascination is rockets/planes, he was in heaven. And loved a little 1-on-1 time with his daddy. I sent the point & shoot with them...

SIX years of us...

2009-05-13T17:46:00.001-07:00

Isn't it weird how something can simultaneously feel like the shortest blink of an eye and yet you can't remember life before it? Six years since our first May 10th.

This year, we had a low-key and yet totally fun day day together as a family. And then celebrated with a date at Forbes Mill (one of my fave restaurants in LG).

Since our anniv and mother's day was the same day this year, it made it extra special. I have a few more pix to get through, but since we're all a bit under the weather this week, here's a few to tide you over.

happiest mother's day ever!

2009-05-11T14:02:00.000-07:00